Man… the gossip train has really been tootin’ its horn lately.
But don’t worry — this isn’t that kind of blog. We’re not doing that here. Being a decent human is still cool, last time I checked. So instead of riding that train, let’s talk about something I’ve actually been hearing a lot in my chair lately…
It’s people feeling disconnected.
More than once this week someone has said some version of the same thing:
“Why does nobody hang out anymore?”
And honestly… that stuck with me.
When you sit where I sit all day, you hear a lot about what’s going on in people’s lives — friendships, stress, work, family, all of it. Lately a lot of it sounds the same.
People feel busy. People feel tired. People feel like everyone is just doing their own thing.
And I think the weather plays a part too.
The sun finally shows up again and suddenly people remember that life exists outside their house. Those first few nice days after winter hit different — everyone starts crawling out of hibernation and remembering they actually like being outside again.
Now don’t get me wrong — we’ve all had plenty of weekends where we’re just at home doing nothing and that’s totally normal. Sometimes you need a quiet weekend to reset.
But usually when someone asks what you’re doing that weekend and you say “Oh nothing really,” they look confused… like they expected there to be something going on.
Which got me thinking.
What happened to the simplicity of just hanging out?
Not some big planned event. Just the random stuff. Running into someone outside. Seeing people sitting on a porch. Stopping by for a bit. Having a drink or just chatting for a while.
Honestly, that randomness is half the fun.
Some of the best nights start with someone saying,
“I’ll just stop by for a minute.”
And four hours later you’re still sitting there talking.
One person shows up. Someone pulls up a chair. Someone else wanders over. Suddenly you're all sitting there talking about nothing and everything at the same time.
And somehow the dumbest things end up being the most fun.
For example, I’ve already been told by a certain person who spends a lot of time doing nails that beer darts needs to be happening this summer. Apparently that’s the plan.
Which honestly sounds like one of those things that starts as a joke and somehow turns into a whole evening.
Even the little interactions matter though.
If you see someone out walking, don’t just do the little windshield wave and keep driving. Roll the window down, say hi, cheer them on.
Who knows… maybe toss them a beer.
I mean, that’s basically small-town hospitality.
Some people are drinking a beer.
Some people are drinking a zero.
Some people are drinking water.
Or maybe you’re just addicted to Alani’s.
It’s really not about the alcohol anyway — it’s about the people.
You don’t have to drink to be part of the group and nobody should ever feel pressured to. Most of the time people just want your presence. Sit down, hang out, talk for a bit — that’s the whole point.
For some people, having a drink is just a way to relax and unwind a little. But everyone knows their own limits, and that’s where it should stay — your limits are yours.
And honestly, don’t be so quick to judge someone if they get a little more buzzed than you expected. Most of the time it’s not about trying to get drunk. Sometimes people just need to let the week out.
You’re allowed to have a fucking moment.
Sometimes laughter, fresh air, and good people do more for your brain than you realize.
If things feel heavier than just a rough week though, don’t keep that to yourself. Let a friend know. Let someone in.
A lot of those real conversations happen in moments exactly like this anyway — sitting outside, talking, maybe having a drink, maybe not.
Sometimes that conversation is exactly what someone needed.
And honestly, this goes for more than just that situation — people need to show a little more kindness in general.
You never really know what someone else is going through. Everyone has things happening in their life that you probably can’t see from the outside.
So if there’s one thing we could all do a little better, it’s just showing up with kindness. Show a little patience. Show a little grace. Be a good person.
Because the truth is, one bad apple really can ruin the bunch.
So don’t be the bad apple.
The world could use a few more good ones.
Friendships also tend to fall into a few different categories.
You have your old friends — the ones who know your history.
You have maintenance friends — the ones you check in with once in a while and keep up with life.
And then you have growth friends.
The people who challenge you, support you, make you laugh, and honestly just make life feel lighter.
In my opinion, those are the people you want to spend the most time around.
Because the truth is, you are who you hang out with.
The energy around you matters more than people realize. The people you surround yourself with shape how you think, how you act, and how you move through life.
That doesn’t mean the other friendships don’t matter.
It just means the people who help you grow are worth making time for.
Because at the end of the day, friendship really shouldn’t be that complicated.
Sometimes it’s just a random Saturday, sitting outside, laughing about nothing, and talking about everything at the same time.
And maybe we all just need a little more of that.
So if you see someone outside, say hi. If you’ve been meaning to check in with someone, send the text. If there’s something going on around town or just a random hang happening somewhere, pull up a chair.
You never know who might need that conversation more than you realize.
And honestly… some of the best nights are the ones nobody planned.
If it’s something we talk about in the chair, it belongs here.
— From the Chair
