Let’s talk about shopping.
And no, this isn’t just my excuse to convince you that you need another graphic tee 😅
Although let’s be honest… sometimes you probably do.
One thing I’ve always found fascinating is why we buy the things we buy.
Spend enough time talking to people and you start to realize that most purchases aren’t nearly as logical as we think they are.
We like to tell ourselves we’re buying something because we need it.
“It’s on sale.”
“I’ve been looking for one.”
“I don’t have anything like this.”
And sometimes that’s true.
But a lot of the time, we’re not actually buying a product.
We’re buying a feeling.
Let’s be honest…
Most of us don’t actually need a new outfit.
But that doesn’t stop us from convincing ourselves we need one for the Morgan Wallen concert in hopes that somehow, against all odds, Morgan Wallen is going to notice us from 300 yards away and immediately fall in love 😅
Deep down we know that’s probably not happening.
But we still want the outfit.
Why?
Because we’re not really buying the shirt, the dress, or the earrings.
We’re buying how we think we’re going to feel when we wear them.
Confident.
Put together.
Excited.
Comfortable.
Pretty.
Maybe even a little more like ourselves.
There is actually a psychology term for part of this.
It’s called enclothed cognition.
Basically, it’s the idea that what we wear can influence how we think, feel, and behave.
In other words, your outfit can affect your mindset.
Crazy, right?
And honestly, women have known this forever.
Why do you think some women wear cute lingerie underneath a completely normal outfit?
Nobody else can see it.
It’s not for anyone else.
It’s because sometimes confidence comes from knowing something, not necessarily showing something.
It’s the same reason we feel different wearing our favorite jeans versus the pair we only keep because we’re too stubborn to throw them away.
Now think about how you feel when you’re wearing an oversized sweatshirt, messy bun, and yesterday’s leggings.
Then think about how you feel when your hair is done, you’re wearing an outfit you love, and everything just fits right.
You’re still the same person.
But chances are you carry yourself differently.
You stand a little taller.
You smile a little more.
You feel a little more confident.
That’s not vanity.
That’s psychology.
And before anyone says,
“Well confidence comes from within.”
Absolutely.
It does.
But let’s not pretend it doesn’t help when we feel good about ourselves on the outside too.
Both things can be true.
You can love yourself and still enjoy a great outfit.
You can be confident and still buy a new pair of shoes.
You can be perfectly happy and still enjoy treating yourself every once in a while.
Now obviously there is a difference between enjoying shopping and trying to solve all your problems with a credit card 😅
Retail therapy isn’t a substitute for actual therapy.
If it was, I think we’d all be emotionally healed by now.
But I also don’t think every purchase has to be viewed as frivolous.
Sometimes a purchase is a celebration.
A new job.
A birthday.
A vacation.
A weight loss goal.
A wedding.
A fresh start.
A confidence boost.
Sometimes it’s simply because you saw something and it made you happy.
And honestly? I think there’s value in that too.
One thing I’ve noticed over the years is that people often buy things during transitions.
New relationships.
New careers.
Kids leaving for college.
Divorce.
Moving.
Big birthdays.
Life changes.
And I don’t think that’s an accident.
Because when life changes, we naturally look for ways to express who we are becoming.
Sometimes that’s through a haircut.
Sometimes it’s through a new hobby.
Sometimes it’s through a new outfit.
The purchase isn’t really about the item.
It’s about the chapter you’re stepping into.
And while we’re talking about shopping, I think there’s something special about shopping in person that we’ve started to lose.
Don’t get me wrong.
I love online shopping as much as the next person.
The UPS driver and FedEx driver are basically my friends at this point 😅
They all love Maverick and Pretzel, and they bring them treats for a bribe 😉
So trust me, I’m not anti-online shopping.
But there’s something different about walking into a store.
Touching the fabric.
Trying things on.
Finding something you never would have searched for online.
Having someone tell you,
“Yes bitch, that color was made for you.”
Because let’s be honest… Amazon has never done that 😅
I also think shopping local matters for reasons that go beyond the actual purchase.
You’re supporting families.
You’re supporting dreams.
You’re supporting people who decided to take a risk and build something.
Whether it’s a boutique, coffee shop, bakery, farmer’s market vendor, or any other small business, there’s usually a real person behind it putting in a lot of work.
And that’s something worth supporting when you can.
So the next time you buy something, ask yourself:
What am I really buying?
Is it confidence?
Comfort?
Convenience?
Excitement?
A fresh start?
A reminder that you deserve something nice every once in a while?
Because most of the time, it isn’t really about the shirt.
It’s about how the shirt makes you feel.
And honestly…
If it happens to be about the shirt too, I probably have one you’ll love 😅
Because if it’s something we talk about in the chair…
it probably needed to be said here too.
— From The Chair
